Be Who You Are
You are so special, I wish I could enter into your thoughts and replace all those negativeness you have about yourself. You are unique and God has an amazing plan for you. You must make the decision to embrace who you are. God has invested desires, gifts, character traits, talents and likes in you, because He knows at the right time under the right conditions with Him by your side you have the ability to do great things. Listen to what the Word of God says in
Psalm 139:14(The Voice version)
I will offer You my grateful heart, for I am Your unique creation, filled with wonder and awe. You have made even the smallest details in me with excellence; I am wonderfully made. I carry this knowledge deep within my soul.
Can you hear that? God wants you to always be aware that you are unique and wonderfully made! God is saying to you, ‘’you are unequalled, even the smallest detail in you, I, God, made with precision.’’ Please read that verse to yourself over and over and really let it sink it.
I also want my voice to hug you whilst I tell you, you are unique, you are super special, there’s nobody like you, no one can compare to you. You may be thinking, ‘’Sylvia you don’t even know me!’’ I know that, but I don’t need to ‘know’ you, you’re a person right? Well I hope so!
Well as a person created in the image of God, you are amazingly made and you were uniquely made to be just you, not someone else. Please don’t do You-tube, Tik-Tok, the TV, or IG to define who you are. You have unique finger prints, a unique voice, a unique walk, and unique thoughts.
God says in Jeremiah 29:11 NLT, For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Eternal, “plans for peace, not evil, to give you a future and hope—never forget that.
I am so grateful that God had a plan for me. I made so many mistakes, I hung out with the wrong people and made wrong choices for a good proportion of my life, to the point where I really had no idea who I was. But God is a master at taking messes and turning it into something beautiful and what I am doing now is using my mistakes to help others beautify their lives and make the most of their time and focus on what matters and for me that’s beautiful. God has given my life purpose.
If you have had a few messes in your life, or made some wrong choices and decisions, please don’t dwell on them, you just need to learn from them.
With God, your tomorrow can be better. The plan of God and the way God brings about His plan, is beyond our understanding.
I am so grateful you have the opportunity to know Him at an earlier age than I did. Please embrace this opportunity.
When I was growing up I always thought my friends were better than me, whether it was their hair, the fact they were good at maths, their vibrant personality, their confidence, their cooking skills, their dress sense or their ability in sports etc.
I spent so much time focusing on what I perceived was good about them, I took no time to look at me or look into me to see who I was, and what I really liked so I could work on being the best me. I spent a lot of time just going with the flow.
We all need guidance on what is good and what is bad in this life. Unfortunately many adults just go with the flow of what’s going on around them or how they grew up, or some, with what their friends are saying or doing or they base their lives on a TV series. Many are fearful to tell the truth to our younger generation for the fear of exposing their own flaws.
A very influential woman I had in my life had so much potential but due to choosing wrong friendships and relationships, I believe at least 60% of the potential put in her by God was not seen. She could have had her own restaurant(s) or a Child minding business. She could have had her own counselling service if she had bounced back from a failed marriage. But when her marriage failed she took it that she had failed and she never recovered fully from that. God rest her soul.
You are young, you are raw material, you are on God’s potters wheel, if not get on there by giving your life to Jesus. God wants to make your life beautiful but you have to stay on the wheel, be committed to becoming great. Don’t look at another made pottery and say you want to be just like that, no! You have to be you, you have to develop the amazing you or else you will fail, or end up making wrong choices and be unhappy and I don’t want that for you.
I am a natural introvert, I like my own company. Some people are extroverts, they love to be around other people. Introvert or extrovert, choose wisely those people you surround yourself with, who you study with or socialise with. You need people who will allow you to be you. People who will help nurture your likes, talents, gifts and skills. The people you surround yourself with will either allow you to be you and will embrace your uniqueness and learn from you, or they will try to get you to conform to be like them and persuade you into liking what they like.
The latter is unhealthy and if you find yourself in this position you need wisdom and courage to step away. You need wisdom and courage to say no to the next time they ask you to socialise, or courage to say no to always doing things their way. If you’re in a controlling friendship and you feel scared to say no, it’s even more the reason to find a way to break away so you can be the amazing person you are. God’s word says ‘’There is no fear in love’’ 1 John 4:18, so your friendships should not cause you to be afraid in anyway. If it does, it
could be a dangerous relationship. God is someone you can trust, He is someone who sticks closer than a brother and His words comfort and give peace.
I believe due to the abuse I experienced growing up between the ages of 9 years to about 12 years, I grew up with low self esteem and it gave room for fear. I had no confidence in who I was, or in my decisions and I just thought I had to go with the flow of what was brought my way. I put up with lots of people, circumstances and situations that were unhealthy for me, even when I felt scared. I didn’t think I had an alternatives.
You do!
Dealing with home situations I know can be a bit more complex, but whatever that may look like for you, help is available. Friends can also be difficult to break away from especially if they’re controlling, but with God all things are possible. You can first ask God for guidance, ask God to remove those difficult people, ask God to help you find people who can help you through that situation you’re facing and ask God for wisdom to say and do the right things. You may need to speak to a trusted adult, or trusted Christian, or an organisation.
You have an amazing future with God and if you hook up with him he’ll help change your perspective for the better as well as let you know how crazy He is about you.
Don’t focus on what others are wearing, watching, doing and hooking up with, focus on your uniqueness. What do you really like to watch? What do you really like to wear? What do you really like to eat? And on and on. It’s so easy to do what others want to do so to win their approval, but looking at someone else and trying to be them or do what they are doing can steal your joy and your confidence. You are only allowed to look at others to admire their uniqueness or to learn how to do something well or maybe not so well!
Do you know something? Everyone at some point in their life feels inadequate or not enough, they might think they’re too tall or too small, to chubby or too slim, to shy or too talkative, too dark or too white, I mean the list is endless . As you get older you realise people can really look confident and look like they have it all together, but many times people live fake lives.
We live in human flesh, subject to flaws, anxiety, depression, anger, sadness, but in Christ we can overcome those negatives thoughts. Is it always going to be easy? No, but it’s a conscious decision to always realign our thoughts to the word of God. We are told ‘’We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us’’ Philippians 4:13. Take strength from God to be who you are. It may take time and discipline for your mind, your will and emotions to line up with God’s truths but you will get there quicker than you think. That’s why it’s so important to have in your circle, friends who are developing their relationship with God. If you always walk with people who you are not in agreement with, there could be much conflict.
You have a heavenly Father who loves you and wants to ensure you develop into the amazing person he created you to be.
So please enjoy and embrace your uniqueness, your character, your personality, your likes and dislikes, you are not one in a million, you are one in the universe!
You can celebrate your uniqueness and be confident in Christ, you are on a journey, you are transitioning day by day and with the right people and environment you will flourish!
God doesn’t want you trying to be like anyone else, that would be cheating yourself, cheating others and stifling the real you.
So dare to be you and you will attract people who admire you and people who genuinely want to socialise with you, help you and be with you.
Remember, not everyone who comes into your life is for your life’s duration, some relationships are only around for a season. So be purposeful about each friendship.
Always think, ‘’What is the purpose of this friendship?’’ and remember you choose your friends, don’t allow random people to choose you into their circle. You have a choice.
I suggest, if you can, take a day or two, be in your own space to think about who you are, who you have around you and what you want to do in life. Make notes, eat some goodies, go for a walk,. exercise and speak to God as you would your trusted friend. Being alone for a while, you won’t die! Sometimes, we just need that; some evenings without friends; without the social media, sometimes we just need time to think.
I believe you’ll be on track for some good changes. I believe it and I want you to believe it too!
Our ‘You’re too LOADED’ workshops also gives you the space to think about your life and make some positive changes. Click here for our workshop page.
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I am here because I love you and I believe in you.
Your friend,
Sylvia Vanessa
(Friendship and relationship has been used interchangeably)
